Cause when you’re fifteen -The Lover
All I ask for, is one book where the relationship between two characters doesn't make me so uncomfortable (I’m thinking of Nada, Hour of a Star and the Time of the Doves). Seriously though, the books in this class will make you feel all kinds of emotions. Now for the book of the week, The Lover by Marguerite Duras. First things first I want to congratulate Duras for becoming a writer despite what the haters were saying (her mom tbh), good for you girl. On a more serious note, this book delved into the relationship between Duras as a YOUNG girl and her OLD lover. It brings up serious topics of the complexities of race, gender and social status in a relationship that has you questioning who holds the power. Now I was on the fence about this after watching this week's lecture but in the end I’m gonna say he’s the one in power because age, maturity and life experience really give him the upper hand here. Now, that's not to say that Duras does not benefit from the relationship with her lover. For starters, there is the obvious benefit that comes with his wealth and social status. She is able to ride in his fancy black limousine to her school and get a taste of that high class life. He also helps her family financially, despite the way they treat him.
When I read this book, it was easy to forget that she was fifteen and a half. Duras writes the book in a way that makes her seem much older. I think it's mostly because of the way she presents herself and her confidence with the man. The way she says that he is at her mercy and that she has more power over him because he will never be able to catch her, made me think she was much older then fifteen. But maybe that was what Duras wanted us to think, I for one had my head in the clouds at fifteen. Despite Durases' best efforts, I think the lover remains the one in the position of power. I honestly can’t see how a full grown, wealthy, adult man can be in an equal position with Duras when she is fifteen! I will say, the book isn't only about the relationship between Duras and the man. It’s a story about her and her family. Her mom and her obsession with the terrible older brother. The weak younger brother, who unfortunately passes away. We also see the dynamic in her lover's family, how he isn’t able to choose his own future and is forced into an arranged marriage. Overall, I can’t say I really enjoyed this book but I still enjoyed reading a book I would never have picked up outside of this class.
For my question this week:
Had they been the same age, how do you think the relationship between Duras and her lover would have changed?
Gabrielle, I wonder if what you mention as confidence or the girl presenting herself as much older might be because the narrator is recounting with the perspective of time. In fact, there are decades in between the story she tells and where she is now. Remember that, although there are some autobiographical notes to the story, she isn’t really writing herself into the story.
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- Tesi
Hi there! If they were the same age I think the dynamics of the relationship would have been more balanced. The love wouldn't be forbidden or seen as wrong due to age, so there would be less judgement which could possibly lead to more open partnership. I do think the story would be completely different.
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ReplyDeleteHi Gabriella, I really liked reading your post and feel you with the types of books we're reading. At this point I do not even want to read about relationships in this class anymore, I cannot handle the abuse and depictions of these women. In terms of your question, I feel like if you make them the same age, it just gives Professor X and Mystique from the X-Men series, where it's poor girl meets rich guy and they grow up together. Thank you so much for your post and I look forward to reading your future blogs!
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